Back for a blog post!
Don't even think people would be reading my blog any more BUT oh well I'm back to rant and rant because these few days I just feel so lonely feel so upset. even when I try to hold on to God, even I know He's there, I just oh well cannot take it any more.
It's like I'm standing in the rain, alone.. look at everyone.
Stuck in this part of life, where everything seems so gloomy and dark. It seems like hope and light is never coming into my world any more. Having problems on my own is enough, why do my friends have to be so not understanding and everything? I was always there when they needed a place to rant. I don't give good advices but I always never fail to give my ears to them, to give them a shoulder to cry on. But where the hell is everybody when I needed someone....
Everything is screaming
Everytime I want to share everything with somebody I stopped my trust issues are coming back I can no longer trust any one because it's so hard you know that feeling so hard so hard so hard I can die. Many times I want to talk about my day it's either I get interrupted or people don't even gaf. yes that's how sad my life is but oh well I don't know. I decided well nvm it's okay I shall just rant at my blog. yea baby so I'm here. you know that bloody feeling when people prioritise idols, tumblr, twitter, facebook more than you. I've tried so hard, why can't you just at least show something to appreciate me. wtf, I am not air. I have feelings. if you stop being sensitive to me then I will stop but the thing is I don't know how to stop because losing a friend is like losing something so important to me I don't know what to feel.
So it's like
I show a face that oh well okay, I don't care I shall just read and sleep and daydream but damn freak it hurts me so much I feel like stabbing everyone everywhere feel like punching my hand into walls feel like Idk but it just all hurts because it's like a pain no one else can know and I don't know how to describe it either. It's just so painful and everything feeling like a loner when everybody else is like so happy talking to each other I hasn't moved on at all and I hate myself for that no joke.
but nobody cares nobody even bother. it's like you try to express your feelings to them but all they do was to notice others because oh well you're just a piece of ugly shit in their eyes even though you aren't then they are like 'oh her? hahaha we don't even know her, she's got that bad stupid poker face that looks like the whole world owns her" OK BITCH why don't you approach me and ask me stuffs you want to know about me? it's not like you can tell my character just by looking at my face I AM A HUMAN not a book don't just read my cover I beg you
We are alone no one else is there for you
remember it
nobody on earth will ever be there for you
no one except God
yes maybe I should tell this to myself more often
because everytime
i just blindly remember
humans can be trusted
and get myself
into pains
that i don't actually have
to suffer.
